Those Days

rosesEver had one of those days?  I’ve had one of those months.

It started about four weeks ago when I came down with the flu.  I’m still battling remnants of it.

Just a few days later, I discovered that my car had been hit in the parking lot of my apartment complex.  No note, no apology, no nothing… just damage to my passenger rear bumper.

Less than a week later, I was pulling out of a church parking lot when I was rear-ended by a truck that couldn’t stop on the ice.  We got out of our vehicles, only for him to declare, “You’re fine, there’s no damage,” and flee the scene.  (The damage was minor, but he couldn’t have seen that since it was dark outside.)  Naturally, his truck bed was down, so I couldn’t even see his license plate to report him. 

 Over New Years, my car was egged, which scratched the paint.  Apparently my car has bad karma.

Two hit and runs in a matter of days?  Produce being thrown at my car?  They were more than random acts of violence; they felt like attacks on my soul.  These events came on the heels of me praying each morning (an exercise as per my counselor) God, show me how much you love me.

I hate to admit it, but my attitude quickly turned bitter.  I see how much you love me, God.

I consciously know that just because I’m a Christ-follower doesn’t mean that I’m exempt from the world and its evil.  But … all this?  Seriously? 

A few days ago, I prayed the same prayer.   God, show me how much you love me.

I ran to Fresh Market over my lunch hour to satisfy my craving for Super Crab Dip (it’s amazing… try it!).  I walked in the store only to be greeted by a gorgeous display of dozens and dozens of colorful roses. 

(Sidenote: I love flowers.  I see so much beauty in God’s creation.) 

I’ve seen similar displays with other flowers in the same location, but I was awestruck with their brilliance.  I felt like God said, That’s how much I love you.

(Caveat:  I don’t claim to hear voices.  But there are times that I feel like God is impressing something on my heart.  This is one of those times.)

*Tears

In that moment, I felt His love.  I know that love doesn’t always mean a feeling, but I sure needed that dose of comfort.

I’m trying to separate God’s love for me from the sucky circumstances that sometimes surround me.  Admittedly, I’m still trying to wrap my head around it all.  Until I figure it out, I’m holding on to my Fresh Market moment, even in the midst of those days.

Have you ever had one of those days/weeks/months?

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~ by Serena on January 14, 2009.

4 Responses to “Those Days”

  1. I felt like my first year of marriage was a little like this. I think Tony would say the same. Its amazing what remains though after the storms pass. What a gift those roses were at the market. And how appropriate too – beauty and thorns. I love your heart Serena, thanks for sharing it with us like this. I’m wearing ugly gym shoes ~ please tell me you’ve got on something couture-ish. 😉

  2. I completely empathize with you. December was a month like that for Angie and I. Angie had two falls from her MS which injured her slightly altering plans we had to celebrate her birthday and Christmas. Work issues really stressed me and I caught a bug I couldn’t knock down quickly. Our newly purchased PT Cruiser had major issues that kept putting it in the mechanics shop all month. Then the ice storm hit northern Indiana keeping us from celebrating Christmas with her family in Chicago. It really made me call out to God, “Why now? Why ruin Christmas? Why anger, frustrate, and sadden my family and I during the holiday celebrating your Son’s birth?” Then I heard his still small voice reminding me to focus on just that point. It is about his Son. It is not about birthdays, parties, presents, or time with family…it is time to reflect on the birth of his Son and all that entails. Through those trials I had forgotten, and he helped me remember.

    • It’s strangely comforting to know that I’m not the only one who had a month from Hell… and yet I’m really sorry that you guys had to go through all that. 😦 But, you’re right, He’s good about keeping things in perspective.

  3. […] than loving shoes, of course), it’s my honesty.  Whether it’s about a disappointing musical, wrestling with my faith, or my body image disorder, you hear about it. And today you’re going to get a good dose of […]

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